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11/02/2004 Archived Entry: "Don't Shit on Me! XO"

I should have known that this was going to not be my day. My only joy today now is waiting for Umbala on iRO. At least there I won't feel like the world's decided to take a shit on me.

It's not angst, thank god, but I think Grade A "Teh Angst™" (patent pending) would've been prefered because there's a solution to angst - a swift kick in the pants. It would've been okay today, had I not had to endure it amongst total strangers and then have to stand there being stared at until I could get to work. Nothing sucks more than that. I would have rather had been stared at for the uncomfortable stye that I've got on my eyelid since this morning. I just hope my birthday isn't going to suck, too. If my birthday betrays me this year, I'm going to throw in the sponge for this month. Apparently, I'm not allowed to vote for this election and it's REALLY pissing me off.

See, when I got married and moved up I had to renew all my ID's. So I got my Social Security renewed, the papers all sent to Texas and Illinois, and then I went to get my photo ID for the state of Illinois. I apparently can get picked for jury duty, but I'm not a registered voter in Illinois. In Texas, if you got jury duty then you automatically could vote. I've served jury duty in both states. You'd assume you automatically earned some sort of rights for that. This is so messed up, I had a terrible cold stone in my stomach last night about it and now I know why.

There's nothing left to do now but to watch and wait. This weekend I'll go and re-register, after I've killed a few thousand or so monsters on iRO to a pixelated bloody pulp for the rest of this week. But at least there's some silver lining left for this week - Umbala. iRO will be implementing the Umbala maps during server maintenance today and tomorrow we'll have shiny new maps to die in. It couldn't have come at a better time, if you ask me.

I know I'm going to get suggested at all day today, but I've given up on trying to vote. I'll just have to wait and go fix things after I'm done giving myself a migraine. I should be used to this, I can remember things like this since I was in grade school. Not being able to do gift exchanges in school, not getting a homecoming mum, no Valentine cards, those little things that just pile up. The real irony of it... "I'm an adult now! I can do things I couldn't do as a child!" "Oh, you can't vote, you suck. Too bad, but everyone else that CAN gets a sticker! YAY!! :D Go home and die now in shame."

I wonder if anyone else got shit on today, too. I hope my family votes, at least. John got to and I know my mother-in-law did, so that's a bit of a comfort. I hope this just isn't the start of "The Year of Getting Shit On". 2004 was sucky, do I really want another four years of suckage at surplus levels?

The nightmare from last night isn't helping, either. I think my mind was prepping me for today or something. There was this guy in my high school class named Joe Steve, he was a real asshole when he was sober, but when he was stoned he was like a puppy. I usually prefered him stoned and would give him food when he got the munchies, sometimes you prefer friends drugged over sober. But anyway, even I have some nice memories of Joe Steve, but I remember after graduation I heard he'd been murdered. Shot on the back of the head execution-style. That was really chilling news. It still bugs me. I've known of two people that I had for some classes that have died. I can still picture them well enough in my head that I'd swear they're just out hiding somewhere. The nightmare last night pulled that memory out from my head and I dreamt I was out in a senior trip and Joe Steve was with the rest of us. It was wintery, snow on the ground in places, and I don't remember anything else but on the return trip I asked where he was and someone says "Didn't you know? He couldn't stand it and blew his brains out."

That's not something you'd really appreciate dreaming about, you know. I didn't know Joe Steve that well, but I don't want to remember him as "that guy who was murdered horribly". No, I'd much rather prefer to remember him as "that guy who was cute when he was stoned". This morning it's been clinging to my mind.

So... *exhales* If anyone else cares to shit on me today, please do so now, because when I wash it all off there's going to be hell to pay.